Bringing GTA based serialised comedy to their very own website soon…
“Baby got bank!” wailed the paraphrasing, overly excited creature as the last of the sun’s rays cast shadows around the echo filled space. Yup, Blondie was a happy bunny and to be fair she had every right to be.
Despite having spectacularly ‘misplaced’ her yacht – ‘The Despondent Otter’ at the weekend, she had mad cash in the bank. $13 million dollars to be precise. Not bad for someone widely regarded as a walking clusterfuck who somehow, some way… always found a way to come out smelling of roses, no matter how deep the shit they found themselves in!
In the past few months, she’d also managed to fill the emotional void left by her dearly departed cat Clovis with an actual real life human being who could talk, buy drinks and act as a glorified taxi service on nights out. Clovis had never shown any interest or aptitude for any of the above…
All in all, everything had come up Millhouse (this is a Simpsons reference). However, like a porno flick missing a money shot, deep down Blondie couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing in her life. However, the call from her dear old friend Molly had changed everything.
Molly or ‘Muhmuhhuh’ (as Blondie often slurred her name when making her many drunken “Giza lift home honey bear!” calls) had long since retired from the crime game. They’d saved the vast amounts of cash they’d made and invested it wisely. Prime real estate in sunnier climbs was now the cut of their jib and they were now making an absolute killing selling luxury condos to people with too much money and too little sense. In a nutshell, Molly had done what Molly did best.
The call to Blondie had been prompted by what Molly had politely referred to as the need for ‘out of the box thinking’ and the use of a ‘wayward spirit’. With that in mind, there was only one person to call… her LS BFF!
The plan was simple, Molly needed someone she could trust to come in as an investor and help her oversee the construction of a luxury resort in the Caribbean. She offered Blondie a very generous forty percent stake in ‘Get Away With Muhdarous – Luxury Resorts’.
In truth, Blondie hadn’t needed to hear the sales pitch, most of which had sailed over her head as complicated words like ‘projections’, ‘budget’ and ‘marketing’ were thrown at her. All she needed to hear was that her old friend missed her enough to want to hang out again and that is how Blondie’s wondering mind had interpreted the call.
As the call ended, Blondie recalled something her erudite father had once said…
“I have to remind myself that some birds aren’t meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up does rejoice. But still, the place you live in is that much more grey and empty that they’re gone. I guess I just miss my friend.”
At least she thought those had been her fathers words. Its possible in hindsight that they were the words of Morgan Freeman. Either way it was reason that allowed her to finally realise that her time in Los Santos was at an end.
She would miss the place though. She would cherish every memory it had gifted her. Every friend she had ever made. Every dollar it had ever sent her way. But it was time to look to the future and explore all the exciting possibilities it held.
It was these very possibilities that excited her more than anything else had in the last few months and when the new person in her life had agreed to become part of Blondie and Molly’s grand adventure, it was as if the stars had aligned.
She took one last look around the apartment, threw a peace sign at nothing in particular and headed out of the door whistling the tune to ‘We built this city on rock n’ roll’…
Tensions have risen between the United States and North-Korea after their first successful launch of an intercontinental ballistic missile (ICBM). With the potential of a nuclear strike on the U.S. west coast, a first strike is out of the question, so alternatives have to be found. The Pentagon is especially interested in covert options, such as biological agents that can quickly decimated the isolated country. As such, they have commissioned Humane Labs to work on a biological agent that is both hard to detect and has a 100% mortality rate.
They have succeed in creating a rather gruesome weapon (as described in the section below). Thanks to recent breakthroughs in genetic engineering, they have created a highly lethal strain of the plague bacteria with severe neural consequences capable of destroying the high level brain functions needed to develop and launch nuclear missiles. They are currently working on a vaccine to fight the disease in case it moves out of the target area. Everything was well thought out, what they didn’t plan for however, was human error.
While working on the vaccine, a member of the research team put a Petri dish with a bacteria colony too close to an air vent. A large number of bacteria are blown into the lab and escape through the door as the research team leaves the room. The infection spreads to most of the staff during lunch hour and to their family and friends over the course of the week. Could this be humanity’s end?
The teams: The police and military simply don’t have enough personnel to deal with the infection, as such the state government has allowed them to deputise private citizens. Every idiot survivalist gun nut is called upon to perform quarantine guard duty, however military intelligence requires highly skilled people to perform covert operations deep within quarantined areas. Agent 14 has called upon you and your bunker staff to do ‘damage control’. The bunkers have been equipped with state of the art air filtration systems to provide a sterile base of operations. Nonetheless the work outside will be very dangerous. You’d better get yourself some protective gear while you can, agent. It’s gonna get nasty.
The Necroa Plague is an infectious disease caused by a genetically engineered strain of Yersinia Pestis, the bacterium that causes the bubonic plague. Although good hygiene has prevented outbreaks in the developed world, attempts have been made to weaponize it. The Pentagon commissioned such a project for covert use in North Korea and Humane Labs has succeed in genetically engineering a strain with DNA from Streptococcus pyogenes, a bacterium that causes highly infectious impetigo, but also necrotizing fasciitis (death of soft body tissue). To decrease the chance of early detection and increase infectivity, Humane Labs has infected their strain with a bacteriophage. A bacteriophage is a virus that replicates within a host bacterium. This particular phage directs the bacteria to the brain and prevents it from spreading to other parts of the body too rapidly. The phage then disconnects from the bacteria and infects the brain together with Y. Pestis. The plague eats away at the brain, causing rapid onset dementia, while the phage causes the brain to continuously release adrenaline. Together they cause severe mistrust of others, aggression and insomnia. During this stage, victims often develop an urge to injure others, causing the infection to spread via wounds.
Not only humans can be infected. Like the with the original Yersinia Pestis, fleas can become infected and spread the infection by biting humans. Species that are susceptible to the Necroa Plague are:
Transmission of Y. pestis to an uninfected individual is possible by any of the following means:
Signs and symptoms
Necroa plague knows a number of stages, each with new symptoms.
Stage 1: The incubation period is 1-2 days, during this time the bacterium replicates rapidly and only targets the brain. The first stage of the disease lasts one week. Symptoms during this stage are:
Stage 2: During the second stage, the virus moves from the brain to the rest of the body, causing necrosis in organs and skin tissue. The skin appears bruised, but quickly develops into blisters and eventually visible necrosis. The adrenaline and dementia cause the victim to ignore the symptoms and continue display aggressive and violent behaviour. At this point the disease is highly infectious. Skin contact is enough to infect someone. This stage lasts one week. The mortality rate during this stage is 40%. New symptoms are:
Stage 3: The third and final is also known as the ‘zombie stage’. The phage injects DNA into the brain and organs to form complex structures which restore low level brain functions and vitals (cytopathic restoration). Adrenaline production and release is increased even further, effectively turning victims into zombies capable of attacking uninfected humans and wildlife. The phage reinfects the bacteria, slowing the disease to increase the chance of spreading the infection to others. This stage lasts two weeks. The mortality rate during this stage is 100%. Victims either die of total organ failure or brain death after the collapse of the phage’s structures when the phage has no bacteria left to feed on. New Symptoms are:
Although no cure or vaccine currently exists, antibiotic treatment has proven effective if administered within 24 hours. Early detection of the disease however can be difficult if transmitted by an infected person in the first stage of the disease, as they show no physical symptoms. Effective antibiotics are streptomycin, gentamicin and doxycycline.
The disease can live outside of the body in an aerosolised form for up to three hours. By then the increasingly weakening bacteria will have been consumed by the phage. It can survive in bodily fluids for up to two days. Full body armoured protective clothing is highly recommended.
After long weeks of expectations
You will finally know who will wear the crown this year
For a year, Blade will be our ambassador !! And will also be the most beautiful character of the crew
THANK FOR YOUR PARTICIPATION
“And don’t be so sad, your day will come”
Wow, I can hardly believe that this is actually happening. I’ve met a very select few of you already, but to organise an actual, though very small, Riot Con is something I didn’t think was possible when I had only just joined back in early 2014, but here we are.
We had to wait for Scoob to get his passport and for once we can actually blame Liverpool for that, but now it’s time to start planning. So far we have a location, Amsterdam, and Scoob, Guinness and I are going. If you fancy a vacation in the Netherlands and meeting up, let us know 😀
In the first place, I apologize for my delay, But what would be an organizer if he is not desired.
For the third competiton of Miss Pussi Riot, the previous Miss Nereus9 Will give up her crown to one of these pretenders:
You can vote on the WordPress or you can send a message on the Social Club (to me well on)
Who will be the next Miss Pussi Riot ?
Yes indeed my lovelies, the monthly crew party is almost upon us again. This month the theme is: Vintage. Wear your vintage duds and drive a vintage car (vintage lowriders included) to the meet at the L.S. Observatory on Friday, March 31 at 8PM GMT. Activities will include:
Be there or be quasitruncated hexahedron!